Saturday, November 22, 2008

Your brains need some rest.

just to share the Dirty jokes that made me LOL ...


(1) To make it straight, she pulls it.
To make it stand, she rubs it.
To make it stiff, she licks it.
To put it in, she pushes it.
It's hell of a job threading a needle!!!







(2) A guy donated blood to his girlfriend. When they broke up, he wanted his blood back.
The girl threw a bloody kotex at him and said,
'I'll pay you in monthly installment.'








(3) Girl in cinema turns sideways and whispers to her boyfriend.
'The man next to me is masturbating!'
Bf: 'Ignore him.'

Gf: 'I can't.'
Bf: 'Why not?'
Gf: 'He is using my hand!'







(4) The Bio teacher draws a huge PENIS on the board and asks
'Does anybody know what this is?

Dirty Harry says 'Oh, it's a penis and you know dad's got 2 of them?'

The teacher says '2 of them?'

Harry says
'ya! The little one he uses to pee and the big one to brush mum's teeth.'





Photobucket




(5) 4 miracles of a woman
Getting wet without taking a shower
Bleeding without getting hurt
Giving milk without eating grass
Making boneless meat hard.







(6) What is the smallest hotel in the world?
The answer is 'Vagina Inn'

It accomodates only 1 standing occupant with his 2 baggages left outside.







(7) Unborn twins saw a penis approaching.
1st: Papa coming, papa coming.
2nd: U fool, it's uncle lah. Papa never comes with raincoat!


P/S: I always wear a raincoat when it is necessary..
especially when Im with guys.




(8) A hubby said to his wife,
'I will take a photo of your breast and frame it.'

The wife said to husband,
'I will take a photo of your penis and enlarge it.'





(9) A girl at 15 is a SURPRISE.
At 25, she is the RIGHT PRICE.
At 35, a GRAND PRIZE.
At 45, a CONSOLATION PRIZE.
At 55, she is a DOOR PRIZE, and
at 65, a GIVAWAY PRIZE.







(10) What did Snow White complain about after having sex with the 7 dwarfs?

Snow White said,
'I would rather have 7 inches at 1 time. Not 1 inch 7 times.'








(11) The vagina is the world's best rehabilatation center.
Even the most violent and aggresive penis comes out humbled, head bowed and reduced in size.






(12) Lady was trying on dress.
Husband: 'Your bum is as big as a BBQ pit!'
Later in bed, husband said, 'Want to do it?'
Wife: 'It's a waste lighting up a BBQ pit for a small sausage.'

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18 comments:

tZeLih said...

HAHAHAHAHAH WHAT THE FARK...NICE LEHHH

Vin Tsen said...

LOL, this is funny! Must be a little bit dirty-minded only can understand!
xD

Copykate said...

funny shit! totally love it XD

the notice from the university, ROFL!

Yi Ling said...

LOL! i cant imagine i actually read the whole of it! omg. >< hahahahha. but it was funny XD

Yi May said...

Cute jokes!Laughing silently. Hahahaha

〤Ecl!5oNz™〤 said...

LOL
i like that papa coming papa coming joke!!
NICE 1...
hahaha... XD

e s t a n c u s said...

WHoa my Gawd!!! Funny!! BUt so not the suitable for minors!! you really must rate it 18sxxxx. haha

piggy~babe*vivi said...

wow..this is so funny and nice..love it...

Lynn said...

Wtf
Monthly installment using Hello Kitty pads -.-

Jordan said...

Great stuff, keep it up

Jordan said...

Great 1, keep it up

J-Teoh said...

Good one, thanks for sharing. In return, will contribute some clicks. :D

Audrey Podrey said...

Haha hilarious!

curryegg said...

lol.. beh tong you la... :P

Janice said...

oh my gudness..
u are lik damn gud in DIRTY jokes man..

Kurogane said...

Nice post...better than mr timberlake....*CLAPS*

candicechong said...

hahahha...omfg...holly shit!!
this is so funny!!
u make my day!! ^^

Ruionkoh said...

Dear


TL,
hahah yeah I think it is worth sharing too :)

vin tsen,
yeah Il bet you are one XD

copykate,
hahaha tell your boi not to do that when he goes to your house yeah XD

yiling,
hahaha naughty naughty XD

yimay,
haha why laugh silently?nobody is watching XD

edison,
haha papa cumming you mean?XD

marcus,
hahaha errrrr we have seen worse post?mine shud be 15sx perhaps?XD

piggy,
yeah haha glad tat u like it :)

lynn,
haha i LOL-ed when i saw the hello kitty pad too ^^

jordan,
thanks dude ^^

J-teoh,
thanks sho much XD i feel honoured though

Audrey,
YEAH!^^

curryegg,
ooo so you are a hokkien too XD

jan,
i din really create it myself XD i mean just partially

kurogane,
thanks dude for supporting all this while ^^

candice,
im glad that iv made your day ^^

Regards,
rui