Thursday, January 15, 2009

whats in the mind?

This is a plain post for me and myself.
no parui-kinda pictures.
nothing interesting.
not an emo post.
not a post for the pussyfacebackstabers out there or so.
For my loyal readers,
you might wanna skip this.
I have once done a reflection post on what I am doing and what I want to do, what I want to be.
This will be another similar shyt.



It might be contradicting that I an asking you to skip but still im writing it.
But who cares?

It is MY blog.

It is meant to be a dump site for me
where I throw my rubbish feelings here and leave it rot here.
but,
also a place where I preserve those sweet memories I had.

I once had this ridiculous thought to earn some side income through blogging.
Blog hell me I was.
Though the cheque is on its way but I still dont think its a very promising return.
I did have fun entertaining others, I didnt mind to degrade myself to entertain the others.
Coz all the while in my life, I usually portray the happy side of me.
To me, as long as the people around me people that I care are happy,
then I am happy.
I still remember some fella laughed at me as I had been living for others' sake.
but as time goes by, I got tired and I notice how powerless am I to give a damn about everybody around me.
I tighten my scope.

Reason(s)?
simple,
As, I grow up, I learn how materialistic-and-looks-orientated can this society be.

Stop shaking ur head as as to oppose my judgment towards the society.

Materialistic,

simple, people use people.
The degree of how the others respect you if they dint know you at the first place is very much depend on how rich are you.
I have seen how students with rich parents were treated differently even back in schooling days.
I have seen how rich relatives are treated differently by the outsiders.
I have seen how rich peoples are given the priorities in public places.
I have heard how rich guys are approached by multiple materialistic admirersbitches.
I have seen how superior can the rich one be among a bunch of friends.
I,
have seen how people use people.
Tho me myself is very much against the materialistic society
but I still work my ass off to pick up some money here and there.
Why?
You tell me, in the current society what can you do or where can you go if you have none?
"Go to the park."
Petrol free?
"Walk lar."
Walk with barefoot?
Walk nakedly?
Whenever the "human basic needs" term appears in my text book,
I always have this in mind,
"why is "Money" not listed as one too?"
People live for money and some even die for money.


Looks,
simple, just look at those celebrities nowadays.
Go ask around,
whether people judge a celebrity's talent first before judging his/her looks
or its the other way round.

"OMG EDWARD CULLEN IS SO CUTE!
"

How often do you hear

"OMG EDWARD CULLEN IS SO TALENTED!"?

That happens not only among the girls.
You tell me, is gifted Pamela Anderson really talented?
I doubt...
Guys/girls dont get fooled when a girl/guy tells you that looks stands zero percent in choosing a bf/gf.
You might wanna try these on ur first date if you think Im crapping:
i) frigging bald part of your hair, preferably the top of it.
ii) wear your grandfather's singlet, shorts and slippers
iii) shave both of your eyebrows
Get back to me when you have experimented tat.

Since olden days, looks play apart in society,
looks does influence one's choice in getting a partner.
But just that it wasn't a major part like how it is now.
Thanks to da medias which make lil girls/guys believe that they can actually have what/who they see on the TV screen.(without being taught the existence of make up or plastic surgery)

To be truthful, looks do come in account when im choosing a partner.
It is in fact the first stage thing I take into account.
BUT,
I dont hope for too much as me myself am not very hot or cute or handsome lol.
"okay-looking" is already a pass to me.
And whether to accept as a partner or not it is then 100% depended on the inner part.
One thing worth mentioning is that I should be 200% glad that Im blessed with a hot beauty as my gf right now(bonus wey XD) , not to mention her inner beauty which plays the bigger role :)

That were just my thought towards the materialistic-and-looks-orientated society.
Like it or not, I am still a part of it.
But well, I am starting to adapt into it already.
I'd better know how to as quarter of my life is gone lol.
Before I forget how I cried for milk when I was one,
I am already turning into a two-decades-man this year. (yes,"MAN" bie XD)

Friends and relatives all are surprised with the degree that I have changed. Yes, regarding how I "publicize" my current relationship compared to the previous 3 years one lol. (but also some other changes which me myself knows it the best) Obviously , this is not another child-play-kinda-relationship or puppy love you called it. Well I dont mean tat i wasnt serious with my previous relationship, I was but it was somehow not so matured one, I have to admit. people learn from mistakes, so do i. I wouldnt want my current relationship to lead to the same ending as before. In fact, im much serious this time. If the previous one couldnt be the last one, I want this to be the last one. Will do anything I could to make this the first and last one for her, well it very much depend on both of us as Im learning that none any other party have da power in ruining the strong bond between me and her as long as healthy communication presents. So stop trying peeps lol.

IF you were to ask me whether am I happy? without any hesitation, I will answer a "yes".
People might have the wrong idea that we both tend to blog show off about our sweet moments from time to time in our blogs. But they always forget that blog is somehow a cyber-journals where you narrate bout your life. So as we both are happy together, we express our feelings and blog about it; you choose to read it, dont complain about it alrite?LOL.

"As life goes on Im starting to learn more and more about responsibility,
and i realize everything i do is affecting people around me."
Akon - Sorry,Blame It On Me

There is always a price for everything, even sweetness. As mentioned above, thats exactly how i feel. And, looking back , I notice that I have grown up alot, maybe not physically but at least mentally : ) Now that both of our parents have known about it, it is healthy and it has already reached a more challenging level, also a level where I would have more responsibilities in juggling between my baby, our families, friends, studies, work/financial etc. It very much serve as a reminder to me as to be much more serious in everything I do as I was much immature years back . You know you just cant afford to lose any of the those listed.

I once sticked 100% to my quote(which you can find it on the side bar)

"IF you love me, Il love you twice as much,
if you hate me Il ignore you"

But, later, I find that its somehow impractical.
People are complicated.
Some "love you" simply because they need you for a purpose.
(Just some past bad experience, nah ,not ex. wateva, at least now Im having my baby who loves me for who am I and not what I can do for her.)

On the other hand,
believe it or not, some hate you because they love you.
Always remember that haters are there to make you stronger.
Thank them.
Which successful businessmen/politicians have less than 74748494993383 haters?
You tell me.

Dont care about those bitchin'. The day when u get numb u'll find ur life are happier than theirs. LOL, so, to peeps who bitch and backstab as much as a chicken shits, just a kind reminder, "to waste time is to waste life". You will come to a point in your life that you regret for wasting more than half of your life moderating others' life instead of your own XD. And to whoever who feel stabbed and bitched, always remember that the ONLY reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. Anyway, its not like I care if I have anyone to bitch bout us being together or just me. I was once told, "never care if people talk too much. As long as they're talking about you." XD


As to close my random post,

I wanna thank those who have been standing by myside since the beginning, regardless of me being single or attached. Understanding enough to give me sufficient support from time to time for years. (Doubtless, this has to go to my lovely sister and a few more peeps lol) And, of course, I would have to thank my baby for everything that she has given me so far. We might have been together for not-too-long still but it feels like we ve been together for years to me lol One thing for sure, the day we got together was also the day that my self-esteem revived. If it wasnt her, im quite sure that , im still slacking badly right now lol.

The reason for not slacking? Her.
The reason for every single wonders in my life recently? Her.


"Being deeply loved by someone gives u strength, while loving someone deeply gives u courage".



P/S: happy 1s anniversary bie once again. Hope I did make our 1st a memorable one to you :) lurve you bie.



6 comments:

PehHwa said...

Yea, I do agreed some of ur statements. Nice post.
Lurve is in the air now =)
Happy loving couple.

Samantha said...

congratulations 'paris hilton' :) hope u've planned what to do on valentines by now! lol

Wenz 宛仟 & Denz 浩安 said...

Congrats! Congrats! Happie for U....V-day cmg right up....hiak hiak hiak

Dani-Elle said...

I've the same thoughts as yours about the sickening society today especially people treat u nice just wan to use u. Totally agree. U go man!

Ahmike said...

fuyoh , ahmike is sniff sniff now.. as though that u were writing it to me sialllll xD i faced what u r facing now.. love is so wonderful. really.. care not about the stupiak shitty da pian backstabber la.. lifeless one

~ ♥ J E SS I C A . T said...

heyya buddy. im so happy for u!

*squeals*

u sound like u rlly do love her

XD